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Here I lay awake restless until the morning. My eyes open and alert when they need not be. Scratching itches that I have until they bleed. Once the blood comes, I can focus on what I should do next but only until I bleed. On goes the monotony.

Where to?

For now I'm over social media. I'm tired of endlessly scrolling everyone's highlight reel of their life. Where's the edification? How does all of that benefit me? I find myself playing the same game, posting pictures of vacation or adorable pictures of my girls just to see how many likes I can obtain. What's the point? Even more-so, I would use social media as an outlet and an inbox of memories so that I could quite easily look back on my beautiful life. Now, it's so hard for me to look at any of that because I'm no longer married and I don't see my children every day. When I'm not with them I miss them so much and feel guilty for not being with them. When I am with them I am extremely happy but often feel overwhelmed. Am I doing right by them? I am just a fragment of what I once was. The only thing I know that I can do properly start my day is to pray to God. That God would give me grace and hope to continue on. This morning I stare straight ahea...