Here I lay awake restless until the morning. My eyes open and alert when they need not be. Scratching itches that I have until they bleed. Once the blood comes, I can focus on what I should do next but only until I bleed. On goes the monotony.
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For now I'm over social media. I'm tired of endlessly scrolling everyone's highlight reel of their life. Where's the edification? How does all of that benefit me? I find myself playing the same game, posting pictures of vacation or adorable pictures of my girls just to see how many likes I can obtain. What's the point? Even more-so, I would use social media as an outlet and an inbox of memories so that I could quite easily look back on my beautiful life. Now, it's so hard for me to look at any of that because I'm no longer married and I don't see my children every day. When I'm not with them I miss them so much and feel guilty for not being with them. When I am with them I am extremely happy but often feel overwhelmed. Am I doing right by them? I am just a fragment of what I once was. The only thing I know that I can do properly start my day is to pray to God. That God would give me grace and hope to continue on. This morning I stare straight ahea...